Fresh Cherries from Yakima

[this is a photograph of jeff weiss, but not the jeff weiss that wrote this post. i googled weiss’ name, and this is the first picture that came up. try it! jeff weiss is pictured in the middle, and i’m sure the jeff weiss that wrote this post makes that face everytime someone asks him to stop blogging about ghostface killah.]

you guys should have known this was coming. jeff weiss, the MVP of music/lifestyle criticism, has offered his excessively talented services to this little old blog [though it probably won’t get as much press as the deerhunter thing, sadly]. since we’re, like, totally blogger BFF’s and what have you, i decided to let him get a few things off of his chest, because true friendships ain’t all rose petals and sleepovers. tell ‘em why you mad, weiss; tell ‘em why you mad!

for next year’s list, i’m going to try to get him to say something nice about lil’ wayne.

10 Things I Hate About Fresh Cherries From Yakima

10. That the name Fresh Cherries From Yakima reminds me of the city of Yakima, a city which no one needs to be reminded of.

9. The fact that the Fresh Cherries name actually makes sense for Douglas’ music, because it forces you to consider the darker aspects of life: serial killers, shards of glass, the city of Yakima.

8. I also hate the fact that Douglas doesn’t look stupid in the kind of hats that I make fun of, mainly because I know how dumb I would look lest I tried to pull it off.

7. I also hate the fact that everyone reading this knows damn well that Douglas could make these songs way poppier if he wanted to. But he doesn’t want to. Because he doesn’t care what we think. And really, you have to respect artists unwilling to compromise their artistic vision for the sake of commercialism.

6. Or maybe you can. Maybe I should use this space to tell Douglas that he should write pop songs like “Hips Don’t Lie” or “I Got it From Yo’ Mama.” People like those songs, right? Right.

5. Douglas…now that I have commandeered your blog, I command you to write pop songs like “I Got it From Yo’ Mama,” or “Crank That” or “Step By Step.”

4. Yes, that’s it, you must form an indie folk boy band.

3. Fresh Cherries From the Block

2. You can get Spencer Krug, Jordan Knight and Deerhunter to join you. (I may be able to arrange a contact with the latter).

Fresh Cherries from the Block Will Be the Top Record of 2008.

This entry was posted on Monday, December 3rd, 2007 at 11:08 pm and is filed under lists. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.